MUM'S COUNSEL



ON DATING AND LOVE.

 

 

 

 

The tragic mistakes many teens make, are a result of not only knowing how to give love, but also of not receiving a love that is accepting and unconditional, particularly from the parent. On the subject matter, mothers have a lot to do in guiding their teenagers right on the subject of Love. Mothers should not shy away from asking their teenagers, if they are engaged with anyone or if they are having a 'cruch' on somebody. Below are some advice to mothers:

 

·       We must strive to communicate acceptance, affirmation, affection and appreciation to our teens at every opportunity that we have.

 

·         We should take every opportunity that we have to model an ideal and biblical concept of love to teenagers.

 

·         We should create time to discuss love with our teenagers. During this time, we should let them know the implications of getting involved in an unholy relationship at the wrong time. We should not have the impression that they're too young . Let us start the discussion as early as possible. The earlier they know the implications  the better.  At a teens forum, my daughter asked me "Mum, when you were thirteen years old, did you have a crush on somebody?". My reply to the question was ''Yes'', but I was quick to tell her at that forum that the young teenager then is not her dad today!  We should be open, real and be frank on the issue of teenage love relationship and the implication of getting involved at such an early stage in life. Some implications are the risk of getting pregnant, diseases and abrupt termination of their education. Though they may be seeing other teenagers in school (twelve, thirteen, fourteen...) getting engaged, we should try to giude them against such acts.    

 

·       It is our duty as mothers to pray for our young teenagers in this regard and also encourage those that are 'matured teenagers'  to involve the Lord in their search for true love.

 

·       Mother should be quick to observe changes in the behaviour pattern of their teenagers and guide them accordingly.

 

·       Occasionally, let's check  their  school bag, wardrobes , school notes etc. When we notice news things on them, that were not purchased by us , we should ask question on how they got them. Don't just give in to the facts that a school friend gave them as gift.!  Teenage boy-fried and girl-friends gradually starts from such act.

 

·       Mothers should endeavour to check on their teen's mobile phones and ask questions about names of friends on their contact list. 

 

·       Mum should ask questions when their teenagers brings an invitation to attend a friend's party. A teen was sharing with me, about a party she attended and what transpired there. How teenagers at the party were rocking themselves and doing all sort of nonsense stuff. Unfortunately, I was told the Mum of the celebrant was there at the venue of the party, giving all her support. Hmm! What a MUM.

 

Above are some of the things we can do as mothers to guide teenagers against tragic mistakes that could affect them in the future.   (To be continued)