...The wise woman builds her house, But the
foolish pulls it down with her hands.
(Proverbs 14:1).
(Proverbs 14:1).
A godly wife is a strong and capable woman. She is wise and she is righteous. She is valuable to her husband and to her family
To begin to
understand the role of women within the family, and in building a happy home,
it is important to understand the background in which the woman was created. The bible describes Eve as a helper (Genesis 2:18
). The bible also affirms that God created Adam from “the dust of the ground”
(Genesis 2:7). Then, from “the rib which the Lord God had taken from [Adam]” He
made Eve (Genesis 2:22). Thus The bible,
describes the first woman Eve, as a "help meet for the man" . To build a happy home, a woman should bear in
mind the purpose for which she was created and set for herself definite goals
to fulfil that purpose.
In recent times, the home is
not what it should be, with regards to God's standard for Christians home. A
lots of Homes are in shamble, with husband and the wife going in different directions
on issues relating to the family. Many
wayward and morally disgruntled children are products of the family,
these days. Tragically, in today’s society, poor value is placed on the family,
and this seems an unimportant obligation to some. In the most extreme cases, where relationship
in the homes are not well managed, breakdown of the homes arises, leading to
divorces cases.
In recent times, our societal continual focus on material wealth has been
a key factor influencing many women in becoming “freed” from their status as homemakers. The
rising need to be a financial support to the husband and the need to be a
career woman, has made many women to accept jobs in the corporate world. For
lots of women, who cannot manage both the home front and the Job without one
affecting the other, this decision has denies many of a happy home. However, according
to the scriptures, God did not intend women to be "freed” from their role of being a loving mothers, caring wives, zealous
Christians and devoted bondservants of Christ.
The woman is a home builder. The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish
pulls it down with her hands."
Woman! How well are you building
your home? Or par adventure you are being foolish by pulling it down with your
own hands. To build a happy home
successfully, a woman have a major role
to play and it is also of great importance to know that it takes wisdom to
build a happy home.
Wisdom in building a happy home.
Wisdom of love
A woman is expected to love her
husband and to love her children. In building a happy home, a woman should
display a high level of love to her husband and children. By this, I mean
unconditional love. A woman should not to show love to her husband mainly
because of what she is getting from him or based on the facts that things are
rosy. Likewise a woman must be available to her husband and should not deny him
of his rights.
for "Many are the right of the
husband". I Corinthian 7:5 says, "Do not
deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give
yourselves to fasting and prayer"
Often times, as career women, we return from our offices and private
businesses, feeling very tired due to the stress of the day. This
notwithstanding, your husband would still demand for his right, please give it
to him. It helps in building a happy home. Don't be surprised that he see lots of
women out there and don't push your husband to look for it outside. Some
Christian women are too spiritual when it comes to this aspect in a Christian
home. "We can't be more spiritual than the bible" like my husband use
to say. The Bible says, give it to him, nothing less.
Be available for your children
as well. Talk to them and you will marvel at what they know. Don't leave this
responsibility to the children worker in church and school alone. We are in the
Information Age where children are exposed to a lot and knows many things. Get
to know their challenges and fears and above all, lead them to commit their
fears unto The Lord !
Wisdom
of submission
While it is most clear today due to many factor, that women have comparable
qualities and strengths as men, God has ordained that wives should submit to
their husbands “as is fitting in the Lord” (Colossians 3:18), and that “…the
head of woman is man” (1 Corinthians 11:3). Wives are to “submit to your own
husbands as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22).
To build a happy home we must be submissive. Don't ever say of your husband 'what has he got to offer.?' Or 'I will do it my own way'. It doesn't work like that. Be humble and submit to your husband and your home will flourish. Submit to your husband and you will avoid a lots of trouble in your home.
Wisdom of training.
The woman has the role of being a wife and a mother, rearing godly children,
and teaching her children in God’s laws (Genesis 1:28; Proverbs 1:8; 6:20;
22:6; 23:22). It is your responsibility to teach and train the children—both
boys and girls in God’s laws.
You
shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you
sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you
rise up. (Deuteronomy 6: 7).
.........My
son, hear the instruction of your father, And do not forsake the law of your
mother.
(Proverbs 1:8).
(Proverbs 1:8).
....She
opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
Proverbs 32: 26).
Proverbs 32: 26).
A good woman that want to build
her home has the prerogative to train the children God has given to her. These
days, mothers are too preoccupied with their work and there is little or no
time at all to train their children in the way of the Lord and to impact into
them, good moral values. Often times, most women are out as early as 6:00am and would not
return as late as 10:00pm or even beyond. They don't even realize the vacuum being created by their unavailability for the
children and the husband until it is too late.
Woman! are you always running up and down for things of life and you are not
available to train your children? hmm!, it has a negative implication in the
nearest future. The Yoruba's in the western part of Nigeria in West Africa has the saying that "omo ti a o ko, lo n gbe
ile ti ako ta '. Meaning "an untrained child is one that will
eventually sell everything we have built and laboured for". When you train your children, you will have peace in your home and you will be
happy.
Wisdom of being a trusted helper and wise counsellor.
Indeed, a good wife is meant to be a trusted confidant and a valuable counsellor
to her husband. God expects us to be trusted helpers and wise counsellors.
.....And
the LORD God said, “ It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a
helper comparable to him.” (Genesis
2:18).
Eve, is a tragic example of a woman who made a terribly foolish mistake. She
was “foolish” to engage with the serpent and was doubly foolish to push
something onto her husband that she knew was contrary to God’s will. Adam was
guilty of being led astray by his wife.
How are you leading your husband astray too. Are you always available to take
vital decisions regarding the home ,with your husband or the man is being left
alone to do it. Some women would say, it is the responsibility of the man to
pay school fees, and house rent, provides money for food and to carry virtually
all the responsibilities in the home.
Woman, what are you using the money you are earning to do? Some would buy
cloths, lace, shoes, gold etc, some women even invest it without their husband
knowing about it because of "some good reasons" best known to
them. I'm not saying that these things
are not good to buy, but I counsel you to do it in the right proportion in
order to assist at home.
Woman! you are in that man's life to help him. You are his "help meet'. He can't do it alone and
you can't either. Help him out. Nothing is too small to do and nothing should
be too big to do on your part. Have full
confidence in your husband. Counsel him rightly on issues regarding your family and you will have a happy and successful
home.
Wisdom in speech
To build a happy home, a good Christian woman must exhibit wisdom in speaking. Being
a 'Lousy Brat', does not help in building a happy home. Woman!, learn to
control your tongue. Even if you are the one paying all the bills. Also when
you are being provoked, control your tongue.
Proverb 9: 13
However, He chastens the foolish woman as being “loud and brash” and “ignorant”
without even knowing it ( NLT).
The Yoruba's in the western region if Nigeria, West Africa would say ' A ki ta ara ile
eni lopo, ki a ri ra Lowon ' meaning you cannot sell members of your household
cheaply, and still expect to buy back at a high price with gain.
A good woman who want to build a happy home will not talk lousy or speak
anyhow about her husband and family. Even if your husband falls short of your
expectations, it is not your own duty to sell him so cheaply to the public and
by this, I mean your friends, relatives, siblings, neighbour, etc. Remember, he
is still your head.
In conclusion, as you focus on God and your family applying all the
wisdom above, all your effort will not be in vain and you will succeed in
building a happy home in Jesus Name.
